Sport Chumpions

A series of unrelated sports gags, each one showcasing a humorous twist on a familiar sport. Archery targets make sense only when the archer's position is revealed, while billiards features a trick shot where all the balls move together. In ping pong, the spectators' eyes follow the ball as it moves. Ski jumpers take a surprisingly long and short journey, while track hurdlers climb the hurdles like ladders. The women's swimming champion turns out to be a mermaid, and the men's champion demonstrates strokes, ending with the crawl on all fours at the bottom of the pool. The scene shifts to dives, ending at a seedy bar. In crew, the camera pulls back to reveal a messy situation. Bicycle track racing is deemed "monotonous," and baseball features a talkative catcher who gets knocked back by the ball. Football takes place at Avery Memorial Stadium, where every seat is on the 50-yard line, one row wide and hundreds tall. On the field, the QB calls signals and hops around, while a ref emerges from a pileup, unsure if it's a touchdown. The play is diagrammed into a huge tangle. Finally, auto racing features a winner who is blurred even when standing still.